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英文小诗精选:Dream of the Evil Servant

by Reetika Vazirani
  New Delhi, 1967
  1.  We kept war in the kitchen.
  A set of ten bone china plates, now eight.
  As if a perfumed guest stole her riches . . . The next day she wanted to leave at noon.
  I said, be back by four, I'm paying you. She sat by the door, she put out her hand,her knuckles knocked against mine,hard deliberate knuckles. I gave her cash.
  Off to watch movies, off to smoke ganja.
  2.  She came back late and high as if my fear asked for it.
  I called her junglee. Everything went off late ——  dinner, the children getting into bed;  but the guests understood:  they had servants too. She stuck diaper pins in my children.
  I cursed her openly. Who shouted? Or I cursed her silently and went my way.
  She stole bangles my husband's mother bought, bangles a hundred years old.
  But she wore frayed jewelry hawked on the street. She was like a rock that nicked  furniture in corners you'd think only a rat could go.
  3. Why didn't I dismiss her?
  I don't know.
  She got old as I got old.
  I could see her sharp shoulder bones
  tighten, her knuckled skull.
  I had to look at her.
  It had to wound me.
  Listen, said my mother. Yes mother, I listened, crouched in my head.
  Looking over the flowered verandah she said:
  Who are you to think you are beautiful? What have you got to show?  Go sit on your rag.
  All my life I tended to looks,they betrayed me. I bore you. I am wretched. Be my mother. Be my maid.

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